A truly thankful Thanksgiving

As a post-op weight loss surgery patient, nothing strikes fear in my heart more than the prospect of a celebratory meal. So I approached Thanksgiving this year with some trepidation. In years past, before this massive change in my life, I would have approached the meal like any other - it was all about the delectable dishes being served, and about showing how you feel by putting all of your love and concern for family into the dining experience. Given that, I was concerned that major holidays like Thanksgiving would be lost on me, since I can't indulge with seconds (or thirds!) like I used to. And so, as the many counselling sessions I've had pre-and-post-op have taught me, a change in my thinking was in order.

This Thanksgiving marked a lot of firsts for me...and lots to be thankful for. It was my first major holiday with my new boyfriend, and we were invited to share in a meal with his extended family. It was my first major holiday post-op where I was in a position to actually eat solid food. It was my first holiday in a new city, and after starting my new job. And it marked my first Thanksgiving in Ontario that I didn't spend with my sister. In the past, any one of those stresses would have sent me into eating overtime under that guise that I was celebrating while I was really dealing with anxious feelings by stuffing them down with food. So I knew going into it that this year, this glorious year, had to be different.

The day was a wonderful inauguration for me. I spent the afternoon catching up with new friends, sharing stories, holding babies and babying pets (all 5 of them!). The food was plentiful and delicious, but I used my coping mechanisms - small serving sizes, eating slowly and not depriving myself. I had about 2 bites of everything, including a lovely strawberry pie for dessert, and felt so good to finally be in control after all these years. That point, in and of itself, is my most significant reason to be thankful this year.

Now that the first food-centric holiday is under my belt, I think the upcoming Christmas holiday should be a little easier. Although I think it will take some time for my brain and habits to catch up with my body and lifestyle, I know that it's possible to make this life change. And I'm not afraid, just happy to have so many caring people around me who are supporting my efforts. My new reality - that food is not the centre of my world anymore - is going to take some time to adjust to, but I'm up for it. I have to say, this mind shift is the hardest part of weight loss surgery. Thirty-five years of gorging at holiday functions is a tough habit to shed - I might venture to say, even harder to shed than the 115 lbs I've lost so far. In fact, when I signed up for the program, they warned me that the mind issues would be far more difficult than the physical issues. They were right.

And so I close this post on a positive, thankful note. I'm lucky to have had the opportunity to get this surgery, to change my life, to have caring, supportive people around me and to finally have my health in hand. All very good reasons to celebrate indeed.